The Lonely (Genetics Challenge)

Listen to this song while you read this installment.

"You know that I love you, right?" Nick whispered in my ear as we lay in bed one night.

"And I love you." I replied.

He took a deep breath in and out. "Mint, you gave me another chance at life. Three beautiful children."

"Of course, but why are you saying this?"

"Mint, I love you. But please be happy. After I'm gone."

"Don't talk about that. Not here. Not now."

"If I don't say it I'll never say it!" He said, almost angrily. Then broke down into a fit of coughing. I regretted my words almost immediately.

"Don't worry, honey, we'll find a cure. Soon."

"It'll be too late." He swallowed. "I'm too old. I..." his voice broke, "can't even count on waking up in the morning."

"It's okay. I love you." I put my arms around him. It would be okay, wouldn't it?

"Mint, tell the children that I love them. Please. When I'm gone. Tell them about me...if they don't remember."

"I will." Tears were tracing paths down my cheeks. "I don't want you to go."

"I remember when we first met." He said. "You came up to me at the gym...and you didn't stop talking until we were best friends." He paused, "You remember that?"

"Yea. I remember. I remember everything."

"You hated kids. You wouldn't go near Juniper for weeks."

"But I came around."

"Yea, you came around, and now she's ... a beautiful young woman." He paused again, "You guys 'll be fine without me." A gasp escaped him. Then a tear. "I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you, too. I love you."

"I love you."

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Dancing slowly in an empty room
can the lonely take the place of you
I sing myself a quite lullaby
let you go and let the lonely in
to take my heart again?

Nothing. I felt nothing. Nick, my husband, was gone. I sat at the kitchen table. All of this was his. He had lived here. Loved here. Died here. I needed to leave; to get away.

I ran out of the room, senseless. Knocking things over. I didn't bother to look back. It didn't matter anyway. I ran. and ran. and ran. There was no where I could go to escape. It followed me. The loneliness.

I didn't sleep, I didn't eat. I couldn't talk to anyone. The pain was too much. No one would ever be equal. No one would ever measure up to the kindness and caring that was Nick. No one.

My daughters took me to therapy. I slowly got better. But the loneliness, the longing, it was always there. In the back of my mind. Sometimes I felt it more acutely than others. But when those times came, Juniper or Jade, or even Forest, were there to support me. Nick was the one who'd blessed me. Not the other way around. I had three beautiful children, and it was all because I him. They helped to heal my broken heart.

[Rip Nick Knack, you will be missed]

"I love you, Daddy."